As a thank you to our fine readers, we are hosting an extreme couponer t-shirt giveaway! Warn everyone in line behind you with our Warning: I use coupons t-shirt! Available in black, sizes M to XXL.
Giveaway will run until 12/17, and the winner will be announced 12/19.
Good luck to everyone who enters, and on behalf of misfits&mascara, have a fantastic holiday season!
This time last year, I had wondered whether I would ever be able to integrate my writing into my already insane schedule, and eventually transition into writing on a full-time basis. At the time, it seemed virtually impossible: my web design business was already taking up 3/4s of my day, to the point where cleaning my apartment and socializing in the smallest of ways went from everyday to extinct. I ended up deeper and deeper into a life that really wasn’t for me, and so far away from my creative goals they became a speck on the radar.
It’s now a year later, and while the cleaning and socializing are still on the backburner (by choice), my writing goals are now at the forefront: my blog for writers is doing well, I’m working on query letters and sending them to my dream writing markets, and I’m running this kick-ass blog and online boutique with my sister/BFF/partner in crime. What more could a girl ask for?
If you were to tell me then where I would be now, I wouldn’t have believed you. I still have a long way to go, but have been making great strides toward my ideal lifestyle, and 2012 will be no different. How did I get here?
1. By taking one small step.
When your life becomes unrecognizable to you, and you are unable to figure out how you ended up where you are, you have to literally take a stand and say, “I’m not living like this anymore.” Letting go of the broken record in your mind, the one that constantly analyzes your past in order to make sense of your present, is the small and necessary first step to get your life in order.
2. By ignoring my inner critic.
I’m sure we could all beat ourselves up for days, weeks, months, about letting outside influences interfere with our personal and professional goals, but really what’s the point? We have nobody to blame but ourselves. We can think to ourselves, “If chatty chatterson didn’t show up at the door and ruin my one day off,” or “If the dog didn’t swallow his chew toy whole I could have paid my hydro bill on time,” or we can take where we are right now, and make every decision from this point on count toward the future we want.
3. By letting myself make mistakes.
In not torturing myself about the things I could have done differently, and focusing on how I want my life to be from now on, it’s taken the weight away so I can focus on what’s really important to me, not the things I’m made to feel should be important. Besides, had I not ended up where I was, would I be as forceful about what I want? Would I be able to take this risk without worry? Would I be able to tell those who guilted me into going down the wrong path to kiss it? It’s hard to say.
It takes one small step to begin getting your life back on track, and many more small steps afterward. As you progress, you will find that the suffocating lifestyle you loathe will eventually get further and further away, and you’ll be able to go back to the fork in the road you veered off on, and start walking in your destined direction.
Distractions are annoying to say the least. All we want to do is work on our creative projects, whether it be our writing, products, paintings, designs, and let’s not forget our blogging. Yet no matter how badly we want to work on them, there is always all of this… crap, getting in the way of our ultimate goals.
So what’s the deal? Why does it seem like the universe it against us when we’re trying to focus? We finally sit down at our computer, and the phone rings. We type a few sentences of our outline, and someone shows up at the door. We type a few more, and suddenly realize we’d better pick up groceries before the store closes. Before we know it, the day is gone, and we’ve barely accomplished anything. We become frustrated, and with what little time we have left before work starts the next day, instead of making the best of it, we become frustrated. We wallow, and eat massive amounts of junk food.
Can we find a balance between our creativity and our lives?
Is there even such a thing as balance? There must be some form of it, otherwise, success would never happen. How do those who are successful deal with the distractions, and the mess life can become?
Can we use our distractions to our advantage?
According to Jonathan Fields, author of Uncertainty: Turning Fear and Doubt into Fuel for Brilliance, yes. In his book, he makes a very valid point about how our creativity can become an addiction—especially when we are completely engrossed in what our working on. Our distractions turn into our only connection to the outside world. So instead of getting frustrated by our distractions, we should use them as fuel for our creativity:
Insight rarely comes while you are constrained to the work and only the work. Indeed, it most often comes when you step away from your work, when you spend time with others in seemingly unrelated worlds. When you sit, walk, and breathe into stillness. When you meditate. Talk. Listen. Love. Be.
Counterintuitive as it sounds, it’s the undoing that plants the seeds of the greatest doing. What I create in any one medium is made far richer by the fact that I spend considerable time outside that medium. It may mean my path to mastery takes longer. So be it.
We can use our distractions to our creative advantage, and therefore in a strange way, they stop being distractions. They become substance for our creative projects, and for us as human beings. It’s a case of finding the discipline to follow through when we do have the time to make a creative breakthrough, which will mean an entirely new blog post during my next period of procrastination.
I picked up our local sale flyers from the lobby of my apartment building last weekend, and the holiday sales have begun! I already have a loose grip on my wallet as it is, and when Christmas rolls around, I become hypnotized, scouring every flyer to start planning what I should purchase and for who (whom?), regardless of the fact that I can’t afford it. Heart palpatations start as commercials for the latest cell phones, clothing sales, and door crashers take over my television, and once the Christmas songs hit the airwaves, I am done for. I become an absolute zombie with the sudden urge to spend every last penny I have on everything and everyone, except of course my bills.
Looking back on what I’ve spent during past holiday seasons, I honestly don’t know how I’m not living in a refridgerator box right now, playing “Smelly Cat” on my boyfriend’s guitar for spare change.
What is the deal with Christmas?
Why do we spend the entire following year paying off the previous Christmas? Why do we feel the need to purchase gifts for everyone we’ve ever met? Why do we feel the need to frolick around with our nicely wrapped gifts and hand them out like we don’t have a care in the world? Is it to try and prove we have our shit together, like the people on the holiday ads in their perfect houses, wearing their perfect clothes, with their perfect tree, and the ridiculous little perfect bows on their perfect pets (who always seem to bark at the appropriate time)?
Probably. We may not realize it at first, but probably. We become so consumed by the fact that our lives are nowhere near where we want them to be, that we use this holiday as a way to live in our preferred world for a while.
Don’t get me wrong—I adore Christmas; it gives me an odd sense of security and I love how thoughtful everyone is toward each other. But we are creatives who need a way to enjoy the holidays without setting our lives back even further—we have a tight enough timetable (and budget) as it is!
Why don’t we productively procrastinate and create a stress free holiday?
No, that is not an oxymoron; it’s actually possible! In fact, I’m doing so right now, and here’s how you can too:
1. Cut back on who you’re buying for.
For some reason, it has been engrained in us that if we don’t buy a Christmas gift for someone, it means they don’t matter to us, which we know is so far from the truth. I have cut back my list of who I’m buying for to the five friends and family members I am closest to (cutting my shopping list by 30 people!). It’s a shopping list I can finally handle!
2. Step away from commercialization.
I only look in sale flyers now for wrapping paper sales, and when commercials appear on television to promote the “best gifts for the holidays”, I shut my eyes and sing songs in my head. If you don’t let how commercialized Christmas has become take you over, you in turn won’t let it take over your wallet. Stick to the real reasons why Christmas is important.
3. Be creative with your shopping list.
Another great reason to stay away from sale flyers and commercials is so that you can clear your mind and choose unique and thoughtful gifts. We are creatives after all, and our gifts for those we are closest to should reflect that. Make a list of gifts you know will be remembered for years to come.
4. Shop online.
Since we procrastinate by checking our facebook and twitter accounts every 15 minutes, why not use that time instead to find the unique gifts we want to purchase? Bookmark the gifts, and as you have the money for each gift, place your order. There is the argument that shipping costs make this a more expensive avenue, but just think of all the time (and gas) you’ll save by not trolling around in stores, and standing in line (and you may not even find what you’re looking for!). The only stop you’ll have to make is to the post office to pick up your parcels, and you’ll have a clear mind to continue on with your every day life. You will also have the satisfaction in knowing that you completed your holiday shopping your way!
In what ways are you creating a stress free holiday? Feel free to post your ideas below!
I used to be quite domestic: somehow, I managed to work full-time, write, maintain a relationship, and keep a spotless home. If you were to ask me how I did it, I wouldn’t have an answer for you. Looking back, I can’t help but feel astonished at how much I used to keep up with, and how little I feel I keep up with now.
What I recently realized is that I am keeping up with as much as I used to, but I’m focused on completely different things: my work and my writing are still the top two priorities, only now I have my blogging to work on, in order to build my platform and transition to a full-time writing career.
Career transitions are tough, especially when your schedule is already jam-packed with a scroll of
to-dos. You have to let things go, such as housework, to fit new items on your agenda that will better benefit your future.
My boyfriend is ridiculously supportive, and if it weren’t for him maintaining the apartment while I continue this crazy journey, I would likely be living in the equivalent of a junk yard. I’ll know I’ve hit rock bottom with my housework when I find a transmission sitting in my hallway.
However, the boyfriend is soon going on a crazy journey of his own: he will be moving to Sudbury after the new year to pursue a radio broadcasting career, leaving me wondering if it will be possible to find room in my budget for Molly Maid.
I can picture it now (*sigh): the apartment will end up sectioned into piles—piles of clothes, piles of books, piles of papers, piles (and piles) of dishes—and I’ll be on a constant search for our cat, who happens to enjoy sleeping in piles, so as not to injure the poor thing. After all, it’s not his fault his owner has become housework-challenged!
There will come a time when I will have to deal with the piles, and you might already be in the piles stage yourself. Without further ado, here are a few tips to get on with it and turn your environment from heap to home:
1. Don’t panic.
When you first look around at all there is to do to piece your home back together, your mind is going to start buzzing (and might short circuit). Take a deep breath, and create a to-do list for each room: broken items that need to be replaced, pictures/shelving that need to be hung, and anything else you can think of that will make the space as convenient as possible for your hectic lifestyle. Create the lists on separate pieces of paper to make the task at hand seem less intimidating. Panic is debilitating, and we already have enough tasks on our plate that delay our creative process.
2. Don’t set deadlines.
This sounds strange, I know, but the fact is we have enough deadlines in our lives! Putting our home together so that it is a direct representation of who we are should be enjoyable (a word we don’t hear often enough). You don’t want any more responsibilities getting in the way of your creativity, so complete your lists as you have the energy. I am a big believer in absorbing everything we do; we don’t want to be so exhausted from other things that we don’t take care during the process. Otherwise, why bother?
3. Don’t rush.
This is a process that should be done at your own natural pace. Start with the smaller tasks to give yourself the brief moments of instant gratification that fuel us forward; this will make the larger tasks seem not-so-large, so you can create a plan of attack that works for you, not the status quo. We are looking to get away from the rush of society, and in my opinion our home is the best place to start.
4. Don’t panic.
I’m offering this piece of advice twice, because here I am referring to a completely different kind of panic. Here, I am referring to the “oh-my-God-I-still-have-so-much-to-do-I’m-never-going-to-finish!” kind of panic (for lack of a better term). As you’re going through this monumental and exciting task, there will come a point where you’re going to question yourself, and your abilities. Especially if you’re like me and your home is no longer a home, it’s just a place with stuff in it, it will begin to feel as if it will always be that way.
When this happens, step away, take a break, and reevaluate your strategy so you can eventually continue with ease. Take great satisfaction in each small item you check off, and by not panicking you will avoid conditioning yourself to feel panic each time you work on your home, keeping the procrastination monster at bay.
A lot can be said about our environment: specifically, how a dull environment can dull our creativity, and until we are able to jump off the hampster wheel for good, it is more important now than ever to create an environment where our creativity can run free, freeing ourselves in the process.
